so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
