yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize