I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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