Well douche your snatch and let's go!
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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