I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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