im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
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