please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
