He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
