I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize
