Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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