What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
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