What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
