what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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