I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
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