Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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