So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
