My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
