i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
God, you're like boner-b-gone
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Randomize
