these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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