Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Randomize
