First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
