I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Randomize
