did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
