At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
