This house was built for laser tag.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
