There was a lot of him and a little penis
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
