Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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