Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
