is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
