I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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