i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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