after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize
