Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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