R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
try to milk me bitch
Randomize