I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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