yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
