I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
