In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
