My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
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