Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
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