We're facebook friends in real life
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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