The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
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