this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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