try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
