i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
