it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
We got so high we made milksteak
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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