using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
we're chasing vodka with high fives
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
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