So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
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