Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
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