im so drunk with asians
where?
always
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Randomize
